For You
by Ina Meh Quin
Summary: One Shot. AU. Auron, who had joined the Crusaders after the Calm, decides to quit after he sees the pain it causes Rikku and the sleepless nights it gives her...


**Disclaimer: I do not own anything final fantasy.**

**This is a one-shot, AU. It kind of falls in with the timeline from my previous fic, One Last Chance. (Kind of...)**

* * *

There were some things that Rikku didn't understand. Spira was at peace, everyone should be happy. Yet, Auron still found the time to head out, and join wars. He felt as though every battle belonged to him, and he needed to immerse himself within them. This was years now... and he wouldn't stop.

The moon was high in the sky, slightly covered by clouds. Near the woods of Kilika, the Crusader's had started a large bonfire. They took no care to the smoke, which drifted into the sky and covered the stars. It made Rikku uncomfortable to know they were so close. They usually held their meetings or _whatever _they called them well away from villages, but this night was different. It didn't ease her thoughts to know Auron was amongst them, chanting with them, agreeing with them. It was almost as if he was brained washed. _Auron..._

Rikku pressed her head down on her hands as she rested along the windowsill of her bedroom window. She stared out into the woods of Kilika; she stared at the drifting smoke from the bonfire. She didn't know the exact time of night, but it was late. Her eyes itched with lack of sleep, but she couldn't sleep without him; she never could. She would toss and turn all night. Pillows would end up around the room, and blankets would wrap around her legs. She would do this until he crawled into bed with her, if she tried to sleep without him. It didn't help that every few weeks he moved them to a different part of Spira. She would follow him to the end of the Earth, and it drained her.

It was when her eyes grew beyond heavy, and stung painfully, that she saw him walking down the forest path. He had his sword strapped to his back, and he had removed his crusader armor. As she watched him walk towards their Kilika home, she knew he was watching her. She knew he would ask her why wasn't she asleep, and she would always remind him that she couldn't sleep until he was home. When he reached their window, he stopped. "Why are you awake?" Auron looked up towards their window.

Rikku sighed with painful eyes. She had pressed her chin down upon her hands so long that her knuckles were sore. "You know why..." she spoke down to him.

Auron tilted his head slightly. He knew. Sometimes he would forget, but he knew. "Get in bed." he said.

Rikku shook her head, "Can't." she said, "Not until you're up here."

Auron sighed. He knew the pain this caused her. There would be days that the lack of sleep was evident on her face. She would walk around with her body weak and heavy, and there would be the dark circles under her eyes. Deep down, it killed him. A part of him wanted to leave the wars, and fights, but he had dug himself so far deep into the carnage of Spira that he couldn't just scoop them out. Joining the Crusader's was a blood oath, and trying to leave was more than saying goodbye.

When Rikku refused to step away from the window, Auron knew he had no choice. He looked back at the woods behind him, and sighed at the smoke that drifted up from the trees. He had only stepped away to grab food and drinks from one of the nearby shops; The Crusader's had drank their every ounce of liquor they had. He had to head back, but he couldn't leave Rikku restless another night. If she continued with her spattered sleep schedule, she could become ill, or worse. He wouldn't be able to live with himself.

He took heavy steps towards the door of their Kilika home, and walked up the stairs to their bedroom. He stood at the door frame for a second; she hadn't noticed him standing there. He wondered if she had fallen asleep upon the windowsill. His eyes followed the outline of her body, dressed in sleeping clothes. She had lost weight over the past months, and her skin was pale. He did this to her. "Rikku..." he said quietly as he walked over to her.

She turned her head slowly, and a braid fell over her face. The rest of her hair was loose around her face, and that too moved just over her shoulder. The dark circles were clear under her eyes. "Let's sleep, Rikku..." he said to her.

She didn't respond. Rikku slowly lifted herself from the windowsill, and into Auron's extended arms. As she pressed herself against his chest, he wrapped his arms around her. She was cold; the night was cold. "How long were you sitting there?" he asked.

Rikku shrugged against his arms.

"Do you know what time it is?"

Again, Rikku shrugged. Auron tried to look into her eyes, but they appeared lost, dark. They lacked the green glow they had in the beginning of their relationship. He remembered how she was then; young and full of life. They had only been together a few years, but internally, it was as though she aged dramatically. "Rikku..." he whispered against her cool forehead.

"This really hurts, you know..." she said in a quiet voice.

It stung. Auron felt his heart drop deep into the pit of his stomach. As he held her shivering body, he knew. He had to change something... and it needed to start _that_ night. Not the next day, or the next month, or after the next Crusader fight. For Rikku's sake, it needed to happen fast.

Auron shifted his face to look down at the woman he loved. She didn't look at him, and her eyes lacked focus. "We need to sleep." he whispered.

Rikku only nodded. She willingly followed as he moved her over towards their bed, and helped her rest her head on her pillow.

It was like heaven, her pillow. The one item in her life that made her comfortable. As Auron pulled the blanket over her body, she looked up at him. "I love you..." she said quietly.

Again, her words stung. Auron swallowed hard. He shifted his body to sit on the edge of the bed just next to her, and moved her hair from her face. "I love you too." he said, just as quiet.

The weak smile that hit her face gave him a moment of strength. It was sudden, but he made the decision that very moment that the next morning he would head down to the Crusader camp, and dismiss himself. If it led to a war between him, and the Crusaders, he would fight. It wouldn't be the first time he was outcast by a society. To be on the run, or in hiding, was something he was used to. He did it for years. As he looked down at Rikku, as she continued to look up at him, he cursed himself for not doing it sooner. Her skin lost it's glow. She was still beautiful, but she wasn't Rikku. "Do you want to leave here?" he asked suddenly.

Rikku blinked at him, "Are the Crusaders leaving again?" she asked, "I just got used to Kilika..."

Auron shook his head. "No." he said, "But we are."

Rikku attempted to sit up slightly, but Auron gently pushed her back down upon the bed and made sure her head rested upon the pillow. "W-What?" Rikku didn't know what to say.

Auron smiled at her gently. With the tips of his fingers, he moved her hair from her face again. He wanted to look at her, that beautiful face. "We can go Home," he said, "I owe Cid an apology..."

"Sorry for what?" she asked.

"For keeping you so far away..." he said.

Rikku smiled gently. "But this... this is what you wanted to do." She said as she turned her attention back to the window. Outside, the trails of smoke floating up into the sky were still as bold as they were hours before.

"I know." he said, "But I made you a promise long before."

Rikku smiled to herself. There was the Auron she fell in love with. The Auron who romanced her off of her feet, and reminded her daily that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen; long before he had promised to love her and protect her forever, for as long as she would have him. She would have him forever...

"But what about the Crusaders?" she asked sadly.

Auron shook his head. He pressed the tip of his index finger against her lips to shush her. "I'll deal with them." he said, "Don't worry about it."

"But-"

"I said don't worry..."

Auron pulled his sword from his back and laid it down upon the nightstand. He looked at it for a moment. "Don't worry..." he whispered again.

Rikku placed her hand upon Auron's arm. When he looked at her, she gave it a gentle tug. _Lay with me,_ her eyes said. He knew every look she made like the back of his hand, and it was nice to see a glimmer in her expression. She was hopeful. As she shifted slightly under the blanket, Auron slid in between the sheets and joined her. It was warm; she was suddenly so warm. "Get some sleep." he whispered.

She took no time. The moment he said the word sleep, Rikku had closed her eyes and drifted away. Auron watched her sleep. He wrapped an arm around her, and pulled her close to his body; she didn't budge, nor wake. She was sound asleep, so quickly. The warmth of her breath against his chest removed the pain from his heart. He told himself that he would stay in the bed as long as she needed, this time he needed to. If he awoke in the morning, and she was still asleep upon his chest, he wouldn't move. He would let her catch up on her rest. Auron wanted her to be fully rested, and happy, when they left Kilika. He would tell the Crusaders when she was ready that he was leaving. They wouldn't be happy, no. Yet, Rikku was more important. It was time that he shifted his focus to the woman who stood by his side for as long as he could remember...

"Sleep well..." Auron said as he watched her sleep. He took a second to move hair from her forehead. As he looked at her face, he kissed her forehead gently. "Sleep well, Rikku..."

He too closed his eyes. It took him longer than she, but he eventually drifted into a deep sleep. His dreams took him to a moment of peace, the peace of Spira. Even in his dreams, he had come to realize, that he needed to remove Rikku from her state of being. He needed to protect her, and focus on her happiness. In sleep, both of them, smiled.

_It'll be a new day tomorrow... Sleep well, my love..._


End file.
